Emotionally, I'm pretty neutral about turning 30. Maybe I just haven't had time to process, but so far it's just fine.

I've been working a new job for a little over a month. Between that and school, there's not much time for anything else. I knit when I can and have my social Friday nights. I'm looking forward to the semester being over so I can find more time to spend with people, and get more hours in at work. Also, I'm slightly burned out. I'm enjoying math (a lot) but my other class is more debate than anything, and it's wearing me out.

We move in 9 days - email/Facebook/whatever for the new address if you need/want it and I haven't sent it. We are so far behind on packing, but we have two weeks to complete the move, so it shouldn't be horrible.

I'm happy about the national election results. Not so happy about local/state results. Desperately hoping that the ambiguity of the language of No. 2 doesn't cause all the harm I fear it will (the stated purpose is horrible enough). Mostly I'm just hoping people can stop using politics as a weapon against each other so much. It's so painful to watch.

Overall, things are busy, but good. I just wish I could kick the mild cold I've been fighting the past couple months.

There have been a lot of changes. Things learned, things refined, things lost.

One of the things lost seems to have been blogging. I haven't been truly blogging much anywhere. I've been doing more of what the cool kids seem to be calling "lifestreaming". I suppose I need to get my FriendFeed more fleshed out with RSS things. I have a lot, a lot of services I use, and probably add one a week or so to that list, but haven't caught up with putting them all into FF. Mostly I was hoping FF would add them as standard services, but there's no reason not to add them myself for now. I haven't been journaling much, either, which is something I want to get back to (where dedicated blogging I can see myself moving away from), both for stress relief and so my feeble writing skills don't fall away altogether.

As for life, well. Where to start?

School is much different at almost-30 than almost-20. I walked away with a 4.0, but it was much harder to get through the course work with the level of output I expect from myself. Still, I am looking forward to next semester.

I'm always knitting. I've started sewing, though I really need a different space to sew in. For now I'm mostly doing cloth pads and bags because they are small and I can cut them out in the space I have. I've stopped baking, mostly, because I need to learn how to bake gluten free, and that isn't cheap or easy.

Oh, that. I should back up.

Long story short, I found a bit of information about a link between PCOS and gluten intolerance. I pursued it and found that, for me at least, it rings true. I had stopped cycling, even on birth control pills. Now, for the first time in my life I am cycling normally even off of them. And that's just one of a dozen changes in my health since going this route. We'll see where it takes us, but so far it's nothing but good. It explains a lot (including finally explaining how I could ovulate and not have a period during fertility treatments). I am still struggling with fatigue, but my body has a lot of healing to do, so I expect that will be a little while in changing.

What else? In November or December we'll be moving. We let go of the house thing for now. The economy is just too frightening. So we're relocating closer to Shawn's job, to a better apartment complex, and a slightly larger apartment. It's also closer to most of our friends, so, extra bonus.

Beyond that I think I am just focusing more on being and doing than on having. I am taking in information, but don't often feel the need to comment on it. I like to see what everyone else is saying. At some point, again, I'm sure verbal/textual contribution will be more important to me, but for now my energy is elsewhere, and that's not a bad thing.

After that, I think I'll apply for transient student status at SPC. I'm hoping I'll be able to do that for two semesters, as I'll still need two language courses that, obviously, can't be taken simultaneously. I really want to take ASL, which is not offered as a distance learning option at BCC. But if that doesn't work out, there's always Spanish, which is offered, and just going to SPC as a transient for the public speaking class to finish the degree and move on to the next.

It was amazing. Sets, costumes, music, story, were all amazing. It was so worth it. Even Shawn enjoyed it.

There were parts of the story that annoyed me, especially from a feminist standpoint (and especially when people tout it as having a "girl power" theme). Also, there was a bit of cognitive dissonance having read the book - that is so very, very different, in every important way. But I was still in awe, enchanted, and amazed. I got teary twice. And I was buzzing after.

And I really, really want to see it again.

Shawn kept checking Ticketmaster, though, and when they opened up a matinée show on the day after opening night... we got tickets. Way in the back, but still -- Wicked tickets!

That was more or less all of our grocery money for the week (almost $30 in fees), but, really, Wicked > food. I've already started singing Popular around the house when no one else is home.

So I've been thinking about "what next?" a bit. I pondered signing up with a temp agency and seeing what popped up, that way I could just take day jobs and not worry about missing days off with Shawn. There's transportation issues, though, and it's not really necessary, or what I really want. It'd just be a job. Yarn money and paying of credit cards. I still might do it at some point. But for right now, I'm doing this instead:

I was going full time when we moved. I filled out a bunch of transfer forms to go to SPC way back then, but I figured out the amount it was going to cost me to apply and send all my transcripts, I could pay for a class or two, so I never went through with it. Then I was going to do virtual classes with BCC and just drive over there for whatever tests came up over the semester when we got a car. Well, that was a year and a half ago, and I kept stalling over the "what about the public speaking requirement?" issue, and finally this week I've just decided I'd put that last and figure that out when I came to it.

Seems a good use of a tax return, eh? Only a gazillion credit hours away from my MLIS.

Fortunato's Italian Market, Central Ave., downtown St. Petersburg has the best pizza I've found yet in Tampa Bay. Mario's in Clearwater is good, as is Azzuro's in Largo, and Gino's in Palm Harbor. But Fortunato's? I was in heaven.

Schakolad, just a block away from Fortunato's, has some amazing chocolates. Their white chocolate pretzels are perfect. I was less impressed with the chocolate peanut butter cups, but I've yet to really love those had out -- my great aunt's version spoiled me. There's a Schakolad in SoHo Tampa if you're on that side of the pond.

Prime Outlets Ellenton is not much father south than going over the Sunshine Skyway, and just off the highway. We went to get Shawn some new sandals, and for me to check out the Lane Bryant Outlet. No joy on one, much on the other. I found a lovely bra that fits me perfectly for $9, and a pair of sleep shorts for the same. There were tons of great deals, and I happened to walk in on an extra 10% off day. It's very worth the trip if you generally like LB clothes. We also stopped at Kilwin's -- I hadn't seen a Kilwin's in two years! Not since Lin, Shawn, and I went to the art fair in Downtown Melbourne. I love, love their lemonade. Their chocolates not so much. I will have to try their fudge at some point, though. It's fun enough watching them make it to be tempting.

Our last point of interest was far in the other direction -- the Jo-Ann Etc. at Citrus Park up Veteran's in Tampa. It seemed like a sewer's heaven to me, and the scrapbook section did seem a bit larger than ours in Dunedin (or the St. Petersburg store), but the knit & crochet section seemed just the same -- much larger in space, but that was because everything was more spread out, not because there was necessarily more variety in the yarn or needle selection. They're all much bigger than the pitiful University location (on Fowler), though. I did find some Moda Dea superwash wool that I haven't noticed at Dunedin, but it could be I don't specifically look for yarn there anymore. Hopefully I'm not so disappointed by the AC Moore in Tampa Palms when it opens.

Also, Crazy Buffet is crazy expensive. Shawn seemed to really love his food, though. (I don't do Chinese, so I just knitted and watched.)

The waves off the Sunshine Skyway were gorgeous, and the sound of the Grand Prix in St. Pete was just disorienting. Tampa Bay? Is amazing.

Luckily, Dan has the answer. So if you're slow to the upgrade party but have been an MT person for a while, you may get this bug, but it's extremely painless to solve thanks to people smarter than I am.

Now, back to your regularly scheduled monthly updates....

What is Toluu?

Toluu is a utility that makes it easy to discover the feeds your friends read and find your new favorite feed. You import your feeds and then your friends can easily see what you actually read. You can also find others who have similar tastes in feeds as you do and discover feeds you may find interesting. It is quite simple.

So far I'm not impressed, for three reasons: I'm only matching with one person, probably because of the overall lack of members. Secondly, it emails me updates from people who have contacted me, but who I have not contacted back. The only way to get rid of this appears to also get rid of the updates from the people you have contacted back. And lastly having to manually import every time I add a feed is a drag and I'm not much of a bookmarklet person. I'm assuming the first two will improve over time, and the third might be less of an issue for most people whose feeds remain fairly static.

I guess I might also be less impressed because I already share articles from feeds I like, and that I think my friends will like via Google Reader, which is further aggregated to FriendFeed and from there to Facebook. So, mostly I'm just wanting to use Toluu to find new feeds, but no joy... yet.

If you don't already have a favorite (Rebekah Pulley), now is a good opportunity to familiarize yourself with the scene.

First was Stevie Nicks. I remember hearing Gypsy one day on the radio and just being absolutely floored. I was stunned silent for hours. It was as if the song brought my identity home to me. It brought me independence, understanding, a place to come home to when things were hard. It was the first time I understood that I was who I had to rely on, and that I needed to love myself first. That fear was normal, but able to be walked through. I kept seeking Stevie Nicks songs for a long time after that, and most of them hit me in the same or similar ways. Many still do, and that goes for all the songs that have been musical therapy to me.

About five years later I found Tori Amos. Tori gave me a way to feel. Emotions that had been so incredibly blocked were freed and given voice. If I couldn't give them my own voice, my own words, I could learn through repetition, the way a child learns to read by being read to. Each album tuned me more and more into myself for years. Liquid Diamonds almost broke me. (Sometimes we have to be broken to rebuild.)

Then, in a twist of fate, while at a Tori concert in Melbourne, an Andrea Florian sampler disc was left on our windshield. It was vulnerability, forgiveness, acceptance, and humility in a box. It helped me heal so many relationships in my life. Being able to admit that I couldn't do everything, that I couldn't fix another's wounds, well, that was a lesson I was in desperate need of at that point. And learning that some things are More than I Am, well, it changed how I took on the world, how I looked into the past, and how I related to others in major ways.

And now, heading into my 30's, I've found someone new. We went to see Amy Steinberg at Sacred Grounds (I had an amazing Venus Envy single shake) last night after I heard Exactly on Cast-On and fell in love. I'm not sure it's possible to capture last night into words. I'm still sorting it out. I'm feeling a new sense of community... connection... trust? That has been missing. The crowd was wonderful, and the show was just so vibrant with a very real and present back and forth dialog. I am not a person who makes eye contact easily but when eye contact was made last night I could not look away. I am not one to speak up, but even in uncomfortable situations, I did. There is a quality to the music, and also to her being that I was brought nearly to tears so many times, only to laugh them away. And that is really life isn't it? I am being taught to let go. To listen.

If this is what people feel in church.... I get it now.

She's playing at Press 2315 in St. Pete on Friday. I have a standing Friday engagement so I won't be there, but highly suggest it. You can listen to a lot of her tracks on Last.fm, but the live experience eclipses it in ways beyond words.

So, yeah, like so many women discussed in the aforementioned posts, I felt like I couldn't admit out loud that I really liked Hillary and was sincerely considering voting for her. All the cool kids hate Hillary! I'm not supposed to vote with my lady parts! What am I thinking?!?

(The whole post is great. Go read it. Really.)

I'll add the caveat that I actually ended up not voting. I'd be ashamed of myself if it weren't for the fact that Shawn and I were canceling each other out, both on the property tax amendment and on the primary candidate (well, that and the fact that my vote for primary candidate wouldn't have counted anyway -- thank you Florida legislature!). I was going to go anyway, but vacation lasted a day longer than planned (we only had hotel money for two nights, but opted to sleep in the car one night rather than going home). So I, unexpectedly, wasn't here to go.

But the blatant misogyny (mostly on the part of the media) in this election season has really been bothering me for months now. Almost as much as the unwitting sexism by people I've spoken with. But I've been in enough anti-feminist debates (mostly with people who don't have a clue about the feminist movement, historically or currently) lately that I just haven't had the energy to address it the way I've wanted to (one conversation about rape fantasy is my quota for life, thanks). So I really appreciate Kate's ever-present way of putting things so eloquently and logically.

I am just so in awe, so inspired, and so hopeful by this election. On top of all of the things that make her a good candidate -- a visually prominent female role model of substance? Yes, please!

And soap. I'd meant to blog about Two Palms for ages. I've mentioned before that I'm a big, big fan of handmade soaps. I don't really have the time and inclination to learn how to make it myself right now, but I'm more than happy to pay the premium for what it does to our skin (and my hair), and for how lovely it makes something simple like taking a bath. I'd been buying my soaps online and at fairs/markets, but how much more local can I get than my own town? The proprietor is always friendly and they have a huge variety of products, including cool little soap rocks, and one of my favorite things in the world -- sea salts. I love the way the feel when they hit my skin and dissolve.

About the boring thing? I am so not complaining. But we got our fill of unboring this past week. For Shawn's birthday I gave him a quarter. And two maps. One a weather map, one a map of the southeast. He had to puzzle out what they meant, and then pick -- a random road trip, or a trip north until we hit snow. So, on top of a new cell phone, some books, and tickets to the FX toy show, he got the random road trip.

We left here Saturday morning for the con, spent the day there. I spent much of it (the drive, and the show) working on a sock. It was mostly sci-fi, and well... that's just not my thing. We did "meet" Nathan Fillion. Shawn first, while I was elsewhere knitting, and got a strange look from him as he passed (possibly intended for the friend he was with who was in a Ghostbusters costume), then both of us when Shawn decided to get an autograph. His lines were the longest, and he looked very tired, to me at least. While I was waiting for Shawn to pick me up (The OCCC is huge and I swear we walked over a mile to get from parking to the show), Nicholas Brendan and Elisabeth Röhm walked out the door and walked by, him lighting up a cigarette and her giving me a strange look. I was working on a very ugly sock (these things happen when you order yarn online...), so that didn't surprise me. I just smiled at her and went back to knitting until I saw Shawn pull up.

From there we headed a couple miles north and got Shawn's much-missed (though I boggle cause, really - ick) Fuddruckers, which are all over Texas and very few and far between in Florida. Then I got to go to the newish Orlando IKEA. I was in heaven. A very, very tired heaven, but still. My favorite store in the mall when I was little was a furniture store with model rooms set up that was maze-like. I haven't grown up from that, really. We bought a ton of stuff that we really needed for $20 (I've been cooking on a frying pan without a handle for over a year, for instance). And probably would've grabbed more if we hadn't been short on time -- it took us almost two hours to look through all the models -- it's that big. When they open the one in Tampa - well, we are already in Tampa pretty often, but that will be another stop.

After that, it was all just whim and fancy. Shawn decided to stay on I-4. We saw the Daytona Speedway, and stood on the freezing cold beach, in a drizzle no less. My silly husband went and ran in and out of the water. I took in the sound of the waves. We made it to just past St. Augustine when we were too tired to go on, so hotel-searching we went. We had to go a couple of exits before we found one in our price range, so when we got in, we crashed pretty quickly.

In the morning we headed north, then flipped a coin between continuing north on I-95 or heading west on I-10. It landed west, so west we went. We spent a few hours in traffic in Tallahassee. Shawn got to see a little of FSU, a couple of my (closed) old haunts, and the Capitol building(s). The car overheated. Tallahassee is bad on cars. We gave it some water and it was fine. Unfortunately, it being Sunday, by the time we dealt with all that and started looking for food, everything I knew was decent off campus that wasn't closed down, was closed. So we headed back for I-10, and Shawn got Chinese and I found a bagel shop about to close. On west we went, getting to New Orleans around eight in the evening. We missed the parade, of course, but did walk about half of the French Quarter. Bourbon Street was beyond packed. I've actually never seen that many happy drunk people all in one place. There was no fighting at all. A lot of stumbling... and dancing. I much preferred the quieter, art-focused Royal Street, though. We drove around a bit looking for dinner, but didn't find anything open for food, but did somehow end up on the bridge from hell. Tiny lanes, no shoulder, very little guard rail, no light, and a long, long way down. That I could see. I'm not scared of heights, or bridges, and I've lived in West Virginia where every road is tiny, there are never lights, and there's always a drop or a mountainside beside you. But the combination of Shawn's exhaustion and fear, my own exhaustion, and not knowing how damaged the bridge was and so on just made it a really bad situation.

It was getting really, really late, and a hotel in New Orleans was out, so I drove back to the rest stop at the Mississippi border and we slept there. I got about an hour and a half. Shawn got about six hours. It was freezing. The next day we went to Baton Rouge, which I really, really enjoyed. We saw the Capitol building which is just stunning. Shawn got some local cuisine. We both got Jack in the Box (another Texas thing that isn't in Florida). It was just a really fun little trip and the city was very pretty and quiet and right on the river. We drove back through New Orleans, to see it in the daytime and check if there were any carnival happenings, but alas, no, so we went on, without looking much more as we knew it was a long way to the hotel we had picked out.

And then got our first real view of the aftermath. We'd driven into New Orleans after dark, and back out after dark, and to get to Baton Rouge we took I-12. Taking I-10 back to Mississippi, it's hard not to cry. There is just so much work still happening, but even worse, so many places where there was no work to be done. Roofs beside their houses, buildings so damaged there's no point in even boarding it up (or maybe there is just no one left to do so). Modern day ruins, without the emotional detachment of something that aged over time or was destroyed by force hundreds of years ago. Knowing that the same destruction would happen here were the conditions right doesn't make it any easier.

We waited until Florida to get dinner. There was a great Cracker Barrel either in or just outside Pensacola. I got chocolate coke cake for Shawn's birthday but forgot a candle. Still, I managed cake and ice cream! We got to Panama City, got a hotel for the night, and got up slowly. I finished my second sock in the car heading towards Apalachicola. We had decided to take 98 and 19 instead of 1-10 and I-75. 98 was lovely and scenic. 19 was unbearably boring. Also, 98 in Panama City had the best bagel shop I've ever encountered -- Bagel Makers. Fresh, soft bagels, even after toasting. Hand whipped and flavored cream cheese (even light cream cheese which I much prefer and never see in bagel shops). Bagel chips. Lots of different kinds of bagels. Exceptionally nice people (I wonder if panhandle Floridians are just very nice by nature -- everyone I encountered there was the same sort of wonderfully friendly). And just a heaven sort of yummy.

In Apalachicola, Shawn found the yarn shop I had planned on stopping at. It was lovely and I took forever picking out some souvenir yarn. The whole town was really interesting -- one of those fishing communities that is full of local shops. I'd love to go back eventually.

The rest of the trip was just driving, more or less. Then getting home. And trying to catch up.

All in all it was a whole lot of driving and laughing and music and love. I really enjoyed it. And I'm glad to be home. Shawn still has a few more days of vacation. I think today will just be resting, though. And tomorrow -- who knows?

For Christmas for each other, we've already bought and exchanged. No wrapping, no trying to hide stuff, no fuss. We plan on spending a quiet Christmas day, relaxing and cooking and snuggling. Maybe going for a drive.

What I got? A replacement camera for my old Sony DSC-S85. I think I mentioned previously that the battery died. I'd really wanted to, when the time came to replace it, get a dSLR, but we just couldn't afford that, so I went with a pocket camera. Portability has its own rewards, and the old camera was not easily portable.

My new H3 is a huge improvement on the S85. I really adore it so far, and it fits in my pocket (if barely), my purse, wherever. If I didn't currently have a half-finished tunic sweater in my Yarntainer, I bet I could toss it in there as well. I haven't really done a full test. Just a "getting to know you" sort of thing. But I'm impressed so far. It could be that having been reliant on six-year-old tech I'd be impressed at just about anything, but so far I'm thrilled at what she can do that my S85 just couldn't. My initial complaints are only that because of the small size, I spend a lot of time accidentally hitting the flash button, and that the Steady Shot feature leaves a lot to be desired (does not appear to work at all if you are using zoom, which is when it's really the most necessary). In fact, I think I'm getting a lot more blur at this stage in the game than I'm used to, but we'll see how things go once I understand all the controls. (Maybe I'll even RTFM. Maybe.) I did miss having a viewfinder a couple times, but I haven't had a glare problem with the screen just yet. I just find it easier to find moving objects (planes, birds, etc.) through a viewfinder.

So far what has excited me the most besides just how much faster the thing is, was that I was able to get shots indoors at night without flash or blur from messing with shutter speed. The aren't brilliantly clear. But they are viewable. Which is much more than I could say for my old cam, even on a tripod with shutter speed adjusted.

Another new yesterday was American Pie Pizza Company in Pinellas Park. The pizza was enh, but Shawn loved his Red Zepplin -- a calzone with chicken cooked in Frank's wing sauce (the kind we buy for homemade wings). They have a... "eat a 29-inch pizza in 29 minutes (two people max) - and it's free" deal if you're into that sort of thing. Oh, and, one night a week (I think Tuesdays?) from 4-8, I believe, they have a thing where kids can come make their own pizza, for free if you buy a grown up pizza. We enjoyed the atmosphere, though, and will probably be back to try the toasted ravioli (one of my favorites, in general, so a new place to get it would be cool). Shawn tried to get me to play Madden with him (PS2 games at every booth), but uh, no thanks.

We both came home rash-covered again. It happens pretty consistently each time we go. It might be the Tide, and, as suggested to us a couple times, it might be bedbugs. Mine is probably an allergic reaction either way since mine reactions are always delayed. But I do have the cluster of three mentioned in the Wiki article, and possibly Sue does not have reactions to them (some people don't). On the other hand, she also uses Tide, and always changes the sheets when we come in case we are staying over, and I know I'm allergic to Tide, and Shawn had never been exposed before, and we were in the bed at midday while bedbugs are nocturnal. Either way, next time we're bringing an air bed or floor mattress!

But the day itself was wonderful. My family is so funny. And talented (we got to see some of Hannah's recent work - wow!). And Shawn & Celest trading shots was a kick.